I came to write

I came to write today
to tell you all how it is again
to have fallen in love
and have it ripped out
and never to return again
But there is a new thing going on
I am falling for a woman of egypt
that I will most likely never see
never feel and always want
You see she is an internet friend
which really sucks
We met during the revolution
kept on, she and I both needed help
and got it from each other
she wishes I was there
I wish she was here
and we can not as of yet
meet in the middle.
The time will come I am sure
which will only lead to other probs
age
there is a generation between us
25 solid effin years
when she hits 35, I will be 60
sounds like shit to me, for her
in the middle of her prime, to be with someone
that will be considered her father, grandfather
lover?
OY, I say
what is wrong with me this time…
why am feeling this feeling of feelings
with someone at the end of a keyboard?
My life at home is nothing more than ok
am I searching for something… yes, of course I am
is this search/find realistic? Probably not
I want it to happen, but know that it won’t
I am sore, tired, hungry, health sucks, brain hurts
and I have found someone 6000mi away that likes me
someone at home that says she loves me
and someone that I love who says go away
SWTFDIDN?

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